Saturday 29 May 2010

Day 28 - The dark art of chewing!

The four week mark has arrived, but the time that's passed seems far longer than that!

So, i've been attempting soft chew since Wednesday night, but as i'm learning, the devil is in the detail when it comes to jaw surgery and the latest little delight is that I appear to have forgotten how to chew. I can accept that a completely different bite arrangement and totally numb upper teeth and palate might cause a few problems, but after 28 or so years of scoffing I figured my mouth would have some sort of idea of what to do when I shoved some pasta its way, but no.

Now you're probably thinking 'is she having a laugh? How can you NOT figure out eating??' Well, my last few attempts have gone thusly: insert forkful of bitesize morsel into mouth (actual chewing seems to be done for effect only at this stage so you don't want to choke), tongue shoves it towards previously connecting teeth, a few experimental open & closes of the stiff jaw doesn't have much effect so tongue shuffles food towards newly meeting teeth. More robotic open & closing merely squashes food into teeth, cheeks and elastics AND IT JUST SITS THERE! Eventually, tongue has to go and retrieve food from all these areas (with the help of a toothpick every few bites) before swallowing what's not still embedded in all these places. How did it all happen so naturally beforehand? There's extra fun to be had if you have a completely numb palate as the food often feels like it's vanished completely and you have to go in search of it - sounds strange, but it's true!

So despite the urge to swich back to mush for the sheer ease of it, i'll stick with soft not-quite-chew for a few days to see what happens. When I caught sight of myself in the mirror having dinner earlier on I was put in mind of a clip from my favourite comedy show below, check out Patsy eating at around the 33 second mark, I looked pretty much like that!


3 comments:

Brent said...

I don't know much about AbFab, but my wife is laughing out loud over her about this clip...but back to you, how wierd to hear your description of chewing...I hope the learning curve is quick for getting back into the chewing habit.
Cheers,
Brent

June said...

That's so funny! I'm sure I look like that woman too when I try to eat. Thanks for the laugh. June

Graham said...

You are looking much better with all that swelling taking a hike!

And I know what ya mean about chewing. You definitely have to relearn it! It comes back quickly though, trust me. In less than a week, you'll be chewing twice as fast (as long as all your teeth are touching).